Tuesday, 20 July 2010

Flashback

As you know, Master wants me to write my personal journal and confess everything unashamedly on this blog. The opportunity to please Master is very important to me and I am happy to obey Him.

A piece of background.

I had a very free sexual life and enjoyed many “affairs”, I was well looked after by many “friends with benefits” before I met Master and fell really in love for the first time in my life since the ordinary youthful romances of the average girl. I was very young when I lost my virginity and discovered sex. My legs which I am very proud of and I suspect other parts of my body as well turned out to be magnetic to the male species, and in turn I was attracted by them so much that I left home early to move away from my puritan prissy shallow family. I found easily a job as secretary in another city and I let a flat. My first position was in fact “secretary with benefits...,” which was the very ordinary way I found to bypass the other candidates while they were far more skilled. You may find that unethical, but my boss was married and there was no night duty. A few blowjobs here and there from under his desk, or the sort of once a week fuck on the visitor’s sofa after the other employees have left was a light charge in exchange of a good job where I could gain experience for the next one. In a way also the shy and formerly well-educated girl I was took some secret pleasure in being humiliated in private. How to explain? I was mentally in pain when sexually abused by that old swine, and at the same time, not always but frequently, I was surprisingly enjoying that fuck toy role. I was certainly predisposed to become the owned slut of a Master.

I stayed a year and a half in this first job then changed, finding a new one less contingent on sex. In the following years I had a wonderful time out of work. Guys are often surprised to discover that quiet girls are the kinkiest, and they pass the word around. I had thus many friends, so to speak. You have understood that sex is important in my life, and still is, but at that time I had no idea of what dominance and submission really was though I have always been very docile and obedient with the male gender, the more in a bed or in any situation where sex can take place.

When I met Master, He certainly judged at once that this girl, always showing quiet obedience, would highly repay His efforts if He cared to train her properly. In His way, He fell in love with me at the same time He seduced me. And, as I wrote earlier, my training started while I was not aware of it. An owned sub is simply a girl giving herself wilfully, openly and completely to a Master. The sub (the slave? What’s the difference?) will do as she is told, follow the rules and will always try her best to please her Master in any way she can. He comes first in her life above everything else. What difference with ordinary love? A Master knows everything about his slave and is capable of controlling her thoughts, actions and feelings - this is how much he is capable of owning her. When I met Master, He already knew everything; He understood me at first sight and was from the outset in-tune with me.

He had progressively His way with me in a delightful mix of pleasure, pain, discipline and hard fucking. From scratch He was my Master and I was his property but we have entered gradually into a deeper relationship, of our own free-will, and I did not realise it for a long time. Master will often use pain as a method of control, torture... and pleasure. This pain can be physical, but more often mental or emotional, and can be intense. Master holds both positions of God and Devil simultaneously to me. He is capable of filling his slave with so much happiness and so much pain at the same time it cannot be explained.

Master makes the rules and he will punish me accordingly if I break them. He will reward good behaviour accordingly. I am a happy owned whore, His property. I can be used and abused for Master’s amusement and pleasure infinitely. A sex slave is a property and not a person. Master is the man I can never thank enough for everything he has given me so far.


(to be continued)

1 comment:

  1. Your story is so much like my own. When you said your Master is both your God and Devil, it put chills down my spine. Exactly. Those words resonate in my soul.

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